Midwife Hunting

As much as i'm Malay, and Javanese at that, I have to confess i'm not that well versed in traditional Javanese healing ways. I don't consume jamu (like ever), unlike staunch Javanese ladies who has tiny waist and glowing skin. The closest I ever got to this ermm tradition.. was when I was in the midst of getting married. Yes, Javanese spa, massages and all. I thought i smelt million bucks but husband didn't like the au naturel scent. Haha.

Well, the thing about being Malay too, is that it comes with a set of rituals of do's and don't's. From getting married to giving birth to other what-have-you's. Because I was raised in the city, I have rather zero knowledge in confinement Javanese style.. this too moulds my thinking into eliminating most rituals I find baseless (and obviously strays from Islamic principles) in Malay community. Such as, adat berlenggang perut, berendoi, cukur jambul.. even akar rempah thingy. Okay, so akar isn't khurafat, but it negates the scientific modern medicine, which I'm thankful Mom is a practitioner of!

So you can imagine the state of cluelessness I am in, when I have to think about this. Yes, part of me still believe there's some truth (make that logic) in Malay confinement practices, only the ones that doesn't medically affect me and my baby's health. I knew I'd have to start somewhere, but i don't know where. At first, i told mom to just pick one based on whom she knew.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

My cousin then told me it's much better to get someone by recommendation. Like, duh! Why didn't that came to me naturally, for someone who researched about anything baby clothing related?  She related a story whereby a bidan somewhere in Penang cut open the doctor's stitches (!!!!) , which scared her (obviously). So she and husband selected few potential bidans and conducted interviews.

Yes, interviews. It sounds funny, but their questions were valid I tell you. Here's some:

a) Do you recite any prayer , other than ayat Quran?

b) Would you open up doctor's stitches?

c) Do you bathe the baby as well?

For (a), the reason was some bidans would recite chants that will somehow 'make' the baby cling to her every single day. So that when her period of service ends, the parents will have to engage her again cos the baby would be crying a whole lot. True story!

I listened with anxiety, but i didn't want to think so much then, because of the state of vulnerability i was in.. I decided to take things easy (i was 6 months pregnant then) and waited for husband to come home. Low and behold, the very next week, a colleague of mine suddenly talked about her bidan. 

She had heaps of praises for her, and looking at her figure, I knew she did a fantastic job! Of course, my friend's high metabolism plays a huge part in it, but i'll buy it anyway! She recommended her midwife apart from the reason above, because the lady comes from a family of midwife and she was also a nurse. I was sold immediately, and I knew Mom would too.

The cons: She charges a bomb, man! We're talking thousands here, for two weeks stint. And we'd have to think about her transportation.

Oh boy. Such huge pros, and cons to even it out. I told mom (and emphasized on the nurse point) and she agreed to it in less than a heartbeat. But of course! Even then, I still wasn't convinced (because of the cost) so I talked to husband.

He then asked me "what is a midwife's job scope?"

All technical evaluation, this guy..