32 and counting

Alhamdulillah, we're now at Week 32..i think ;) because every time we head to the doctor's office, the scan showed difference in terms of age between head circumference and body. Normal i suppose :)

So this weekend (it still is a weekend.. I'm typing this on a blissful Sunday morning while husband is in deep sleep) we have got a packed schedule! Let's recap yesterday's activities, shall we?

Noon: Went to Littlewhiz warehouse (and the only sales boutique i think) in Setia Alam to get the infant car seat. Husband had done some research, while i took a liking at Maxi Cosi Cabriofix. We both agreed infant car seat is the best after reflecting on our lifestyle, and we definitely don't mind getting the convertible one when this baby outgrows the seat.

 The warehouse / HQ / boutique was stuffed with parents & parents-to-be. It was nothing like FabMom or OBW probably because this is the only outlet they have, hence it was all industrial..if you can call it that. We went specifically for the infant car seat, and because it is a sale, you can expect great discounts for all (available) models. When we got there, we saw Maxi Cosi, Halford and ... this one

Cybex Aton 2

 

 sunshade!

 

caught husband's interest. Little did i know, he'd done research on this one :) It is sturdy (albeit tad heavy) and comfy.. it's well padded so we wouldn't have to get additional paddings for it. It actually costs the same as Cabriofix, and feels better than Maxi Cosi Pebble. We decided on it, and then went around the (cramped) aisles to look for additional pillowcases and extra receiving blankets. We wanted to get another bed set as well, but it was too stuffy for me to think properly :) Other shoppers bought Moses basket, breast pumps, bath tubs.. while the whole store is on sale, i definitely am grateful we had settled the bulky items much, much earlier.

 

I wanted to get few more items, but decided to get that at OBW instead. Much much comfortable and spacious!

 

We then had lunch nearby and then...

 

Afternoon- night: Reached AEON Bukit Tinggi to redeem our free movie passes that we got from my department team building some 2-3 months ago. It would expire this weekend, and coincidentally so does our AEON cards. We saw 2 Guns, and i had this feeling this movie would be the last before i give birth. Who knows when the our next time would be, cos i'm definitely not taking my young baby to cinema anytime next year!

 

Hmm i would rate the movie as so-so. While it wasn't bad, it wasn't something i'd pay again to see.. unlike Daniel Craig's James Bond or Christian Bale's Batman sequels. Bias, i know .. :)

 

We did some shopping, well, husband did.. with his birthday just in 2 days, I badgered him to pick a present. He chose a pair of sandals, which comes from the same series as mine :)

 

It was sometime after that, around 8.15 pm, that i started feeling some cramps in the lower abs. It came intermittently, and every time it did I could not walk even. We chose to have dinner there as well, and pain subsided when we sat. I felt the pain again as we walked all the way to the car. Thank goodness we decided to postpone grocery shopping, because i really felt hot and bothered by the pain!

 

I remembered thinking, I'm only in 32! But then, some moms had given birth in 32! But I haven't packed yet! Heck, i haven't done baby laundry yet!

 

We reached home, and the pain left. I read up, and it feels like Braxton Hicks! I've been having these thoughts, that i'd deliver much sooner than i thought (37weeks maybe) .. so i have 5 weeks to go!

 

This morning, fresh and wide awake, I have just soaked in first batch of newborn clothes (all whites) and hopefully, be just as motivated to continue throughout this whole week.. 

 

Things i've yet to buy:

• Cot & beddings for Shah Alam  house
• Minyak telon
• Nappy cream (to use daily, not reactively)
• Socks (for me)
• Pyjamas (also, for me)
• More maternity clothes & bras & stretch mark cream
• Bath tub for Shah Alam house! 

Phew! Wish us luck!

Checking up

We have more or less 8 weeks to go, insya Allah. I've been telling husband almost every single day that I'm nervous.. about delivering, about making it to PCMC on time, about breast feeding, about expressing & storing milk, about baby care. All these in mind, i truly hope junior here is all smiley inside, with no worries. I really would blame myself if she comes out with a frown!

I'm feeling all kinds of blues today, so I decided to blog about something that makes me happy : baby preparation!

I have not written about prenatal care and visits so far, have I? Okay, so upon discovering this pregnancy sometime middle March this year, there was no question or a single doubt I had set my mind on which gynae and hospital we shall be frequenting and ultimately delivering.

First and foremost, I'm thankful the company provides awesome maternity benefit (as well as medical coverage for spouse and family) so it was a matter of where and who. Obviously I chose Women & Child Clinic PCMC for its vicinity to my parents' home, that most of my colleague-friends had given birth here and most of them with the same gynae that I'm currently seeing.

The other advantage I have is that my mom used to be a nurse, with experiences working with most senior O&G specialists now opening their own clinics. Alhamdulillah for these two benefit, for all I did was proposing their names to Mom, and she would provide her 'review' on each of them. Most of these specialists now 'reside' at PCMC, APSH, Gleneagles, Kg Baru MC and SDMC. Obviously I wanted a female gynae, as it's an obligation for us Muslim to find a female gynae for aurat observation. 

Even though delivery process is considered 'darurat' as when that time comes, the focus shall be on getting the baby safely, and male specialists are allowed.. but  i do think it's a hassle to change doctors, plus with the advantages that I have, it's not that the female specialists are of limited quantity. Therefore shouldn't be a problem at all, to choose a female gynae.

Dr Seri had treated me last year when we suffered ( i say we because husband and i was deeply affected) the miscarriage. She handled our case well and with such finesse.. there and then I knew I'd choose her the next time Allah grants us this rezeki. She just happens to be the only female Muslim gynae at PCMC, which makes her most sought after and that translates to a packed schedule. Oh, another plus point is that her mom lives nearby my parents', they even share the same ustazah! Her mom had few times said if it's too difficult to get an appointment, let her know. Although the offer was tempting, I didn't take it up because I feel there was no need to abuse the privilege :)

Because of that, I didn't immediately get a date to see her once the physician at TTMC confirmed this pregnancy. I was fine with that, and settled for checkups at a normal clinic with a scanning machine. We picked a clinic near our house for that purpose, and for the first trimester few sorts of incidents caused us to frequent the clinic. I fell, had fevers, headaches, flu and Alhamdulillah since the clinic is near it saved us time. 

We were given 10th June, evening to finally see Dr Seri. I suppose Allah had timed it perfectly, as we'd entered 2nd trimester then there was more to discuss and explained as compared to 1st trimester, where everything seemed uncertain and more fragile. From this point forward we have been consistent in the appointments, despite more patients coming in on Saturday we definitely didn't mind as that's what private treatment gave us - flexibility. Sacrificing working days are not something feasible to both husband and I, hence Alhamdulillah again for the private treatment benefit.

Last month I brought my mom instead of husband to the monthly check up, as he was on an overseas assignment. I thought it'd be fun to see them catching up, and how right was I! All smiles rekindling their times back then in GH :)

The check up procedure is very smooth.. A text will be sent to my hand phone with time and date reminder couple of days before. Upon arrival, I would just hand in my pink book and wait for the nurse to call for urine test, weight & blood pressure check. The waiting is done in a separate holding area from the billing process, which comes after the appointment. When I say billing, it means signing off a receipt which contains a medicine docket, a form of which later on we would collect our monthly supplements at the pharmacy in ground floor.

Friends had asked me what's her consultation charges, but honestly I do not know as it wasn't indicated anywhere in the bill :) some cynical friends would question her availability when i'm in labor, some would say labor pain is the same no matter government or private hospital.. I usually respond to these with a smile. It's rezeki, and all of us are entitled to our own share of rezeki. 

Our next appointment is due next week insya Allah, 3 weeks gap from the last one and as time and baby progress go, closer appointment dates are expected. I am excited and nervous! 

Baby clothes

Those cute tops, onesies, rompers.. everything about them makes us would-be parents weak in the knees. The soft pastel hues, the prints (animals, abstract, dolls.. what have you's) and the tiny size never fails to make us go "awwww..". They come in ranges of prices, you can never say they are unaffordable. 

Unashamedly, I am one of these moms. I understand how my peers in this pool would get lost in baby stores and return home with extra 2 bags of things they really didn't have to spent. 

(Loosely translated as.. been there, done that)

When we first started shopping for the baby, I was determined we should get the clothes much, much later in the pregnancy journey. Well, you can say we succeeded about 80% in sticking to it. Firstly, I really don't have the idea how much does a newborn need (no thanks to different check lists available online). This prompts me into doing more research on the practical number. Secondly, i knew once i start buying clothes, there is just no way to stop. 

Secondly, because our monthly budget and allocation forces us to settle big ticket items (ie stroller, cot, drawer, breast pump) first before everything. Again, like i mentioned in previous post, all boils down to your lifestyle, your requirement.. and most importantly, your budget. Thirdly, clothes are available almost everywhere (KL wise, that is) in comparison to say, good stroller boutique. 

I didn't spend much time choosing clothes during all baby expos that we went. Somehow the idea of jostling against the crowd and trussed up tops and pants does not apply to me at all. Despite that, i did spent 5-10 minutes in one or two booths selling properly hanged sleepsuits, and come out with a couple of them. 

Over the months, we bought them gradually with these in mind:

a. For babies age 6 months and below, their neck still need support hence button down, kimono style tops are the best. (Best advice given by a colleague)

b. Baby clothes does not have to be expensive, nor cheap.

So yes, the clothes come from variety of places.. Mothercare, baby expos (Shah Alam, Midvalley & Citta Mall), Sunway warehouse outlet, Jusco, Tesco & Giant hypermarkets! As long it fits Criteria #1, then all is good. Saying that however, I found 5 pieces of onesies (3mos) in the stash. I really do not know how they got there.. but i'm pretty sure it must've come the earlier trips.

I was just arranging them cute tops and pants we bought yesterday, just to prove to husband we did not have that much clothes yet. Imagine my disbelief when the box were already full to the brim (and that's without recent baby gift my sister gave). I swear I didn't realize we have bought that much! I did plan to buy some this month, but after yesterday's stock take...

Mission accomplished! Next week would be perfect to start the laundry going, insya Allah.

I do think the baby needs more receiving blankets, and towels...

Train Reads

Ever since I got married and moved to Shah Alam, I have about 29 minutes to spare on the train on the way to work, and around 40 minutes back home. Over these 2 years plus, most of my time in LRT would be spent sleeping (can't blame me, the air conditioning was too comfy). But I do pick up the reading habit from time to time.. ranging from blogs, Solusi (really worth every cent).. and currently 

As of today, I'm few pages short of 100, and I have around 8 weeks to finish the remaining 600+. Teeheehee.

I got this from Kinokuniya, after pondering why haven't I got some hardcopy reference on this special journey. And this pondering took place around Month 6. Yes, all these while I depended on phone apps, a simple Islamic guide on pregnancy and.. blogs. Shame on me. But I've always believed Allah will grant you things when He believes it is the right time, so I don't feel so guilty.

Most friends get by without books, and somehow I believed I didn't need it as well since I have the What to Expect when you're expecting in my phone. But all that changed the day I walked into Kinokuniya. I don't know which books my friends believed it was unnecessary (they could mean pregnancy books?), but I know deep in my heart, most answers to all things baby must contained somewhere. I googled must-have books for mothers, and this comes at #2, instead of the Expecting book.

This book covers all phases starting from newborn right up to 12 months.. It touches on baby necessities, breastfeeding tips, starting on bottle feeding, simple baby recipes (once they reach 5-6 months) and emergency tips (colic etc). I love the fact that it does not discriminate mothers who choose formula to feed their babies, and at the same time encourages breast feeding moms to do the best they can, by listing its health benefits. May Allah make my breast feeding journey easy for this baby and her future siblings, Amin.

As the author is a Brit, most baby necessities are centred on its four season (ie. types of clothing),its culture (pram, bassinet) and UK support groups (ie. La Leche) but these doesn't take the bulk of the book, so it's still very much relevant to us Malaysian mothers.

I only hope i am able to finish this book prior to delivery!

Midwife Hunting Pt 2

I had some ideas what a typical midwife does... prepares herbal & steam bath, lathers some funny smelling paste onto forehead & tummy, massages for hours (i like this one, i do.. i even have some ideas which areas she should focus more), and tends to the baby. Oh yeah, even wrap you up with a bengkung. But what i don't really know is.. which comes first, and how long will each session take.. and most importantly, how do i balance nursing with all these?

Husband, on the other hand, never saw any of these because back in the kampung, everyone DIYs. Well that's what he says anyway. And obviously, nobody really had sat down with him and taught him the basics of Malay confinement. But being a technical guy, he wants to know all he can, so he told me to get some referrals from friends who reside nearby.

From my conversation with friends, most of them had traditional bidan came over. But none of them went into specifics, which i was disappointed because i really wanted to know more. All they said was, they only pay on the basis of sincerity and they had to pick the lady up. 

So yes, the one recommended by my colleague stood out from the rest. Maybe because this colleague had described in such detail (cost, scope, experience) so I was sold on that. Mom had earlier gave her a call, and knowing how much they have in common, she literally would remind me everyday to book this lady. 

I called her one night, and to sum it up in points:

• She stays in Selayang, which is not that far from Keramat
• Available packages: 3 days (RM 6++), 7 days (RM 13++), 14 days (RM 26++), 21 days (i didn't ask)
• Apart from everything bidan, she cooks as well
• Transportation included
• Will also bring extra paste/herbal mix for sale, should we need more after her service ends
• Medical background so no hanky panky mambo jumbo pawang stuff. Speaks fluent English (most senior trained nurses are) as well
• Deposit RM 100, balance to be paid upon job completion
• She has assistants that could do the job in case you still want her packages but she's unavailable. 

Alhamdulillah, she's available on my due date. I'm not too worried if I deliver earlier, because as a former nurse, I'm pretty sure she has considered this prior to confirming my booking.  May everything goes smoothly as planned, InsyaAllah.

Midwife Hunting

As much as i'm Malay, and Javanese at that, I have to confess i'm not that well versed in traditional Javanese healing ways. I don't consume jamu (like ever), unlike staunch Javanese ladies who has tiny waist and glowing skin. The closest I ever got to this ermm tradition.. was when I was in the midst of getting married. Yes, Javanese spa, massages and all. I thought i smelt million bucks but husband didn't like the au naturel scent. Haha.

Well, the thing about being Malay too, is that it comes with a set of rituals of do's and don't's. From getting married to giving birth to other what-have-you's. Because I was raised in the city, I have rather zero knowledge in confinement Javanese style.. this too moulds my thinking into eliminating most rituals I find baseless (and obviously strays from Islamic principles) in Malay community. Such as, adat berlenggang perut, berendoi, cukur jambul.. even akar rempah thingy. Okay, so akar isn't khurafat, but it negates the scientific modern medicine, which I'm thankful Mom is a practitioner of!

So you can imagine the state of cluelessness I am in, when I have to think about this. Yes, part of me still believe there's some truth (make that logic) in Malay confinement practices, only the ones that doesn't medically affect me and my baby's health. I knew I'd have to start somewhere, but i don't know where. At first, i told mom to just pick one based on whom she knew.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

My cousin then told me it's much better to get someone by recommendation. Like, duh! Why didn't that came to me naturally, for someone who researched about anything baby clothing related?  She related a story whereby a bidan somewhere in Penang cut open the doctor's stitches (!!!!) , which scared her (obviously). So she and husband selected few potential bidans and conducted interviews.

Yes, interviews. It sounds funny, but their questions were valid I tell you. Here's some:

a) Do you recite any prayer , other than ayat Quran?

b) Would you open up doctor's stitches?

c) Do you bathe the baby as well?

For (a), the reason was some bidans would recite chants that will somehow 'make' the baby cling to her every single day. So that when her period of service ends, the parents will have to engage her again cos the baby would be crying a whole lot. True story!

I listened with anxiety, but i didn't want to think so much then, because of the state of vulnerability i was in.. I decided to take things easy (i was 6 months pregnant then) and waited for husband to come home. Low and behold, the very next week, a colleague of mine suddenly talked about her bidan. 

She had heaps of praises for her, and looking at her figure, I knew she did a fantastic job! Of course, my friend's high metabolism plays a huge part in it, but i'll buy it anyway! She recommended her midwife apart from the reason above, because the lady comes from a family of midwife and she was also a nurse. I was sold immediately, and I knew Mom would too.

The cons: She charges a bomb, man! We're talking thousands here, for two weeks stint. And we'd have to think about her transportation.

Oh boy. Such huge pros, and cons to even it out. I told mom (and emphasized on the nurse point) and she agreed to it in less than a heartbeat. But of course! Even then, I still wasn't convinced (because of the cost) so I talked to husband.

He then asked me "what is a midwife's job scope?"

All technical evaluation, this guy..

29 at 29

All praises to Allah the Almighty, for He has granted us the journey this far, and with Allah's blessings, until junior reaches full term and possibly be out by end of that month :) Although I have experienced series of backaches, shoulder aches, nosebleed.. and recently pelvic bones ache, i still feel all of these pales in comparison with the active movements felt in my tummy :)

Anyhow, we have more or less 11 weeks to go, insya Allah. Suddenly time flies so fast, my heart starts beating every time i see Deliver Me on Discovery channel. I don't know how composed i will look during labour, although i try to psych myself by saying I will go through it gracefully. 

Right.. So i have created additional tabs in our Excel expenditure sheet, which consists of timeline and hospital bag checklist. In between husband's travelling, i no longer keep tabs on receipts because (a) most major items has been bought, and (b) i mostly buy little things like clothes and blankets which doesn't add up that much when he was away.

Timeline captures info such as weekly things to do, where to buy what vs time that i have before this baby pops out. I put in a 'Stop Shopping' alert in week 36, because i'd be full term then, and from that week, really, we're just counting days down. Hospital bag obviously lists stuff to be packed and stash in the car once week 37 reaches.

I have to say, i love checklists, despite its ability to silently tell me how (un)prepared we are by each week :) the feeling that i get everytime i update it post shopping trip... like i can now breathe normally. I suppose, that's one of the chapters i'm grateful i don't earn that much.. because the joy we get spending a little bit each month beats the spree.. anytime!

I do have an issue whenever we walk into baby store.. my mind will play games with my heart. Telling me we need more of this and that. More clothes, more blanket, more Medela bottles. Considering Mothercare sits up there, and quite far from my office (well, it is far to me) I rarely visit the store. Yeay for me and my purse!

I have gained 7 kgs from the start until now. If you ask me, yes i'm terrified as i have couple of months to go, which means anything could happen. But Nauzubillah, i'll just pray my weight wouldn't balloon that much. During our last checkup, my awesome gynae says my weight is pretty much nice looking on the graph. Alhamdulillah, anything for you dear baby :)

Check up for week 30 is due this Saturday, insyaAllah, hopefully all goes well. Big 3 is finally here! Baby stuff wise, Alhamdulillah we has crossed out so many items :) everything except car seat. And booking bidan. 

There's a lot to be done rupanya! Okay, i should talk about what need not, and what need to be bought.. 

Cot or Playpen, that is the question

Way before we found out I'm expecting (7 months now, Alhamdulillah), we made the decision for our future kids to sleep separately. For starters, they'll be co-rooming with us so they'll know Mommy & Papa are very near. But .. on a different bed :)

We had different opinions from other parents about this (harder to feed at night, they won't sleep sound, malas nak alih), but for now we are sticking firm to the plan and tawakkal the kids will happily oblige. So off we went to research land to discuss what type of bed would be suitable for the little one.

There's two options: cot and playpen. We took out the cutesy Moses basket / bassinet from the picture simply because the baby will grow quicker than the return of investment we'd get from purchasing one of these. It's fine to get one if you have extra cash and also for memory's sake, but for us it's not an immediate necessity :)

So our method was to decide either playpen or cot for our home. Our deciding factors were:

• space (same goes for stroller) and storage
• quantity (one of each, or one for both homes)

We then settled for playpen, seeing that we'll be spending some time for confinement at my parents' we can just pack it up and lug it back to Shah Alam. Of all brands sold in Malaysia, we love Graco (and spent hours browsing its online site) for its design, durability (from newborn to 7 years) and easy storage. 

Of course, we knew not many stores would carry that extensive range hence we may not get the design that we like, plus the price would be hefty. But considering this set can be used by future additions, this seems worth it. I did some research as to which mall in KL carries this brand, and found out First Few Years (only at The Curve and Paradigm) does, albeit limited models. Other warehouse outlets does sell this brand, but fewer choices than the ones sold in FFY. 

We saw this one the first time we step into FFY

Such a cutie, this one. Comes with a changing table, string of soft toys,  cover, diaper stack, wet wipes casing... all of these were music to my ears! For months we had set our minds to this model, and one weekend in Ramadhan we decided to purchase the set. I should also mention we made most purchases early, cos husband had some work assignments in Korea 1st week of Syawal itself, plus knowing my body strength, i knew i couldn't (and wouldn't) walk far come third trimester. 

We went to FFY The Curve, and listened to the sales pitch again. It was this time, that my gut spoke strongly for one of its function. That after certain weight, the bassinet has to be lowered, for safety reasons. Of course i am all for safety, so this kinda bugged me a lot. 

I pictured putting baby back to sleep would be straining my back, as the next level would be the bottom. The fact that this playpen is almost half of me, i could be falling inside it as well.

Jokes aside, i told husband of this concern and... immediately our focus switched. To baby cot, here we go! As The Curve sits opposite IKEA, that was where we headed next. Mind you, it was only few minutes before berbuka yet there we are, finalizing plans for cot. I told husband let's just have a look, we don't necessarily have to buy that day, but he was on a roll i suppose (well, looking at the time frame we had, travelling and all). 

We bought a cot and a drawer that day.. It was funny when i think back, that we rushed to gulp some mineral, perform our Maghrib prayers at Curve, rushed to IKEA, chose the model.. we almost completed our shopping trip when i insist to have dinner. It was 8 something, and pregnancy hunger is red level-high priority action item! Poor husband had to entertain his wife, so we walked back to Curve and had dinner at Bubba (worth mentioning he wants to eat here). Took our car afterwards to IKEA and i waited patiently while he quickly grab those two items and headed to payment counter.

That was some workout i tell ya.. But yeah, we had managed to tick off two items alhamdulillah. Right now, the list has evolved to including things to do (laundry, setting up cot, sterilize everything). Lots of things to do, but only one component missing: husband still away!